My Story - Alisa Adonijah

I got this e-mail from a reader and I'm happy to share with you her story, as she sent to me. There's a lot to learn from each other like I have said before, and always know, you are not alone.

I never in my life thought of getting married and divorced, but sometimes we cannot help but let go. I got pregnant at the age of sixteen, and had my son when I was almost 17yrs old...that was when his father went and paid my dowry. There was nothing like a church or Court wedding. The marriage lasted for only 7yrs with 2 lovely kids, a boy and a girl. I know some people will ask why I left the marriage; why  I couldn't make sacrifices for my kids?.... Yeah! I was advised by so many people to stay because of my kids. If I had stayed because of my kids, by now my kids would have been without a mother and maybe my daughter would have gotten pregnant or married at the age of who knows, 15yrs, 16yrs, or 17yrs?. I walked away then and now, I'm shouldering the responsibility of my kids all by myself - that makes me a strong woman! Their father is very much alive and working but never there for the kids or their needs. 

THE JOURNEY THROUGH SINGLE MOTHERHOOD
1. Is it easy? The answer is no. You automatically become father and mother, always putting their needs first before yours, you don't want to hear if anything goes wrong in their life, so that makes you to be up and doing.

2. Is it easy to find a man to accept you the way you are?  To some, it's easy and to some it's not. Some men will always look at you as a liability, because of your kids or kid. To some men you are their gold mine, not even thinking of you having your kids to take care of, they always feel they are doing you a favour by dating you. Only the God-sent will accept you the way you are and love you. And such men exist.

3. Do your friends support you in this journey? It depends on the kind of friends you have around you. Some of them envy you for having kids and some are intimidated by you, when the men are supposed to come after them but they go for you... They turn out to be broadcasters of your life to people. I have met such kind of friends.

HOW DO YOU STAY HAPPY AS A SINGLE MOM?
1. Be happy with yourself and your kids
2. Always look pretty
3. Stay in an environment that you are happy with and also hang around people that love you, those with genuine love for you.
4. Enjoy serving serving God always.
5. Know the kind of man you would want to spend the rest of your life with, in case you do want to remarry... And there is nothing wrong with wanting to remarry. Just don't settle for anything, God has a great plan for you. Never put your life on hold for any man, you deserve better...keep moving, if he truly loves you, he will catch up with you and also help achieve your dreams and goals in life.
6. Above all, be prayerful, only God is a true friend, true lover and great provider, only He sees the best in you that no one can see, only He understands your pains and He promised He will never leave you nor forsake you.

God bless every single Mom out there, those secret tears will soon be wiped. And the Lord will continue to strengthen you.

Alisa